The following is the C.B.T. (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) Equation

Your Thoughts = Your Feelings = Your Behaviors

Thoughts/Beliefs = Feelings = Behaviors = Results/Reality

The Chain Reaction: How It Works
Step 1: Thoughts/Beliefs
  • What they are: Mental interpretations, assumptions, stories, or judgments about ourselves, others, or the world.
  • Key point: Thoughts are not reality—they’re our meaning-making filter.
  • Where they come from: Past experiences, cultural conditioning, upbringing, trauma, learned patterns.
  • Automatic vs. Conscious:
    • Automatic thoughts happen reflexively (often negative or limiting).
    • Conscious thoughts are intentionally chosen or reframed.

Example:

  • Automatic thought: “I always mess things up.”
  • Chosen thought: “I’ve learned from mistakes before, and I can do it again.”
Step 2: Feelings/Emotions
  • What they are: Bodily sensations + mental labels that arise from how we interpret situations (our thoughts).
  • Thoughts are the cause, feelings are the effect—but this happens so fast, we often think feelings come “out of nowhere.”
  • Emotions serve as an action signal—they nudge us toward certain behaviors.

Example:

  • Thought: “This meeting will go terribly.”
  • Feeling: Anxiety, tension, dread.
  • Physical response: Sweaty palms, racing heart.
Step 3: Behaviors/Actions
  • What they are: The choices we make or avoid making in response to our feelings.
  • Emotions prime us for certain behaviors (e.g., fear primes us for avoidance, excitement primes us for approach).
  • Behavior often reinforces the original belief, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Example:

  • Feeling anxious about a meeting → speaking less, avoiding eye contact.
  • Others may perceive you as disengaged → reinforcing your belief that “I’m bad in meetings.”

Step 4: Results / Reality

  • Our repeated behaviors produce tangible results (or lack thereof).
  • Those results then feed back into our belief system, either strengthening the original thought or prompting change.

Example:

  • Avoid speaking up in meetings → career growth slows → belief that “I have nothing valuable to contribute” becomes stronger.
  1. The Cycle in Motion

Belief Emotion Behavior Result Reinforced Belief

  1. Belief: “I’m not a good public speaker.”
  2. Emotion: Nervousness, self-consciousness.
  3. Behavior: Decline speaking opportunities.
  4. Result: No improvement, missed chances, others never see your skills.
  5. Reinforced Belief: “See? I’m just not cut out for it.”
  6. The Psychological Foundations
  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) → focuses on changing thoughts to influence emotions and actions.
  • Self-Perception Theory → we infer our beliefs by observing our own behavior.
  • Neuroplasticity → repeatedly choosing new thoughts/behaviors rewires neural pathways, making new patterns easier over time.
  • Reticular Activating System (RAS) → your brain selectively notices things that confirm your beliefs (confirmation bias).
  • Why This Creates Our “Reality”
  • Your brain filters reality through your beliefs.

Two people in the same situation can have radically different experiences based purely on their interpretation.

  • Over time, this feedback loop hardens into patterns of reality—your career path, relationships, health habits, etc.
  • How to Change the Cycle
  • Awareness → Notice your thoughts without judgment.
  • Questioning → Ask: Is this thought true? Is it helpful?
  • Reframing → Replace limiting thoughts with realistic, empowering ones.
  • Behavioral experiments → Act “as if” the new belief is true and gather evidence.
  • Emotional regulation → Use breathwork, mindfulness, or physical movement to shift state so new actions feel possible.

Quick Reframe Example

Old Loop New Loop
Thought: “I can’t network; I’m awkward.” Thought: “I can learn to connect by asking good questions.”
Feeling: Social anxiety Feeling: Curious openness
Behavior: Avoid networking events Behavior: Attend and speak to 1 new person
Result: No contacts Result: New acquaintance, slight confidence boost