About
Challenged by the Thought of Therapy
Deciding to go to therapy is not an easy one. The stigma alone makes you think that maybe you’re crazy or weaker because you can’t figure it out on your own. This frustration leaves you with feelings of shame, hopelessness, and thinking you will never achieve what you want in life.
Other people seem to be able to work it out just fine.
Why not me? Why can’t I do it?
Yes, all the above and more. Unfortunately, our culture has a rather dim view of those who seek therapy, and we feel even worse off by admitting we need to ask for help from a mental health professional.
Overcoming the fear of asking for help.
This fear of seeking help is especially true if you’re a guy; when you’re a guy, you’re not supposed to have feelings, certainly not the kind of feelings that make you think you can’t “buck up” and work it out on your own. Guys should be stronger than that, not being so wimpy that you need to go into therapy.
You are racked with self-doubt, feeling isolated because you don’t feel comfortable talking to your family or friends for fear of them not understanding what you’re going through. You continue to stuff your uncomfortable feelings more and more, resulting in more confusion about what to do.
Avoidance fails to relieve the pain.
You’ve been able to avoid or at least distract yourself from these painful, uncomfortable feelings – and it’s been working somewhat until lately. Now that strategy is proving disastrous, accumulating over time and worsening as time goes by, compounding the problems.
Those behaviors that I used to make me feel better are now taking on a life of their own and spinning out of control.
Your drinking and drugging are increasing, and your overeating is getting out of control. Your obsession with video games or Facebook, Instagram, etc., is wasting a lot of time that you should devote to something more useful or productive. And it goes on and on.
And I completely understand because I have engaged in several avoidant behaviors in my lifetime to find some relief. I was a smoker, hooked on marijuana in my early adult life, drank alcohol when I couldn’t get marijuana, overate, shopped to excess, and yes, I had anger/rage issues.
So, I understand what it’s like to avoid painful feelings, sometimes at any cost. But I also very much know that it can get better!
Crisis Creates Opportunity
Or perhaps I should say, “Crisis Can Create Opportunity,” depending on how we respond to the crisis.
On a spiritual level, crisis creates the opportunity to become more aware of what is going on in our lives, so we can grow and learn from these experiences to become happier, healthier, and more successful human beings.
Crisis is a way the Universe “guides” us into changing our lives for the better. To “guide” would not be the word most of us would use concerning the crisis. It’s more like forcing us to change, even though we go into this mode kicking and screaming at times because we don’t want to feel uncomfortable.
The intention of “negative” things that happen to us in our lives is not meant to hurt us but to help us learn and grow. Everyone who has come into therapy has received something out of it and grown in some way, no matter how long they stayed in therapy.
Remember, “What We Resist Persists, What We Look at Disappears (Carl Jung and Neale Donald Walsch).” Being in crisis and having to go into therapy is a way that can help focus us on looking directly at the problems so they can disappear forever.
Therapy is a Great Way to Create Calm from Crisis.
Therapy helps us become aware of the underlying problem(s) that are causing the uncomfortable, painful feelings so we can release them and become stronger, more confident, happier, and more resilient, and better able to deal with the challenges of life.
But you’ve tried talk therapy, and it didn’t work for you. Why would this therapy be any different? Why should you get involved with these methods I am proposing?
Using these same methods that I now use to help others, I was able to release my anxiety, fear, panic, bouts of depression, self-loathing, and anger/rage at the world. And so have hundreds of people that I have helped over the years. I would also like to help you along your quest for freedom from these feelings.
Let’s work on your transformation.
The transformative methods that I use and have been using for over 25 years,
such as E.M.D.R., Brainspotting, etc., get to the deeper parts of the brain and “rewire”
the trauma that caused these painful patterns to take root and helps to
quickly and permanently remove them.
Once released, you will feel calm, confident, and empowered,
ready to thrive in your work and social environments.
Working with these methods to release your pain and uncomfortable feelings will help you…
- experience mental, emotional, and spiritual healing,
- learn how to deal with stress effectively,
- release self-doubt and feel empowered with no more need for Procrastination, People-Pleasing, or Perfectionism,
- release negative, self-limiting beliefs, and
- get clearer on who you are and what you want to do, where you want to go.
YOU ARE LIMITLESS!!
You are not your negative thoughts, beliefs, or limitations.
Limitations are things that have been taught to you by others in society throughout your life.
About Me
The “Proof is in the Pudding”
With all my promises and reassurances that these methods work, the actual “proof in the pudding” depends on whether something is successful or effective. You make this decision by putting it to the test by trying it or using it yourself to see if it works for you.
As I have said, I am very familiar with all of the avoidant behaviors employed to stay away from the pain and discomfort because I’ve tried just about every one of them. I desperately wanted to avoid my painful feelings, big time.
Even when I was in talk therapy, I spent many years engaged in just about any behavior that would help me feel better and provide some relief. As I’ve already stated, I was in talk therapy for 10 years when I was in my 20’s and 30’s but could not release the trauma of my childhood that caused me to become a “rageaholic” with high anxiety and bouts of depression.
I am living proof.
After 20 years and four colleges, I received my bachelor’s degree (because of my “Stupid” thing), graduating Summa Cum Laude, and receiving a listing in “Who’s Who in American Colleges and Universities.” I then received acceptance to Columbia University in an accelerated program and graduated in 1½ years versus 2 years. This program was highly competitive, admitting only 25 of the 800 applicants.
The Proof in the Pudding for me was that I would not have been able to accomplish all of this unless I had worked with some of these methods to let me release my beliefs, thoughts, and feelings that I was stupid, the primary issue in my life which was not true.
Since then, I have received training and/or certification in several very effective alternative therapy methods, including E.M.D.R., Brainspotting, E.F.T., W.H.E.E. Therapy, and have copious knowledge of many other methods.
Credentials and Training
Credentials and Training
I mention all this not to try to impress (well, maybe a little), but to illustrate the epitome of what a negative belief can do to someone even though the negative belief was the opposite of the truth. I also mention this example to show how different life can be if you start listening to your True Self instead of listening to individuals who try to define who you should be or minimize you to make themselves feel better.
Because of the methods I now use with my clients, I could release the trauma of my childhood and get better over time. What got me better was finding a way to feel the uncomfortable feelings long enough to release them, forever.
My goal is to help you overcome adversity.
Helping others overcome their negative life experiences is a trait I have had since being a teenager. I remember negotiating with the high school administration to readmit a young friend of mine even after the teachers and administration vowed to never let him return.
My mission in life now is to help others overcome their problems. Whatever the problem, I want to help others recover from the dysfunction brought on by their negative childhood issues, like the ones from which I recovered.
Because of my struggle in my younger years to overcome my childhood issues, I have become a seasoned professional with many years of experience helping different people with very different problems. Because of my past, I have great empathy, understanding, and compassion for those having problems in their life. It has also made me a good listener.
My knowledge, years of experience, and expertise working with these more effective methods have benefitted many other people by releasing their pain and discomfort. I will also help you release yours to be happier, more confident, and more successful!
And my personal qualities of being grounded, down-to-earth, easy to talk to, trustworthy, committed, and integrous don’t hurt either. I also have a great deal of respect for the client and am sensitive to their individual process.
Testimonial
“…you have always been compassionate, caring, patient and encouraging. You have taught me the tools to handle my fears so I could be more independent and take more control of my life. I am stronger, more sure of myself and happier. Thank you.”
– R.C.
What to expect from me: A Specialized/Unique Approach
You will receive effective cutting-edge therapies that result in “rewiring” your brain and releasing negative beliefs, thoughts, and feelings. These methods are so new that only a small amount of therapists have the training to use them.
Solution Focused – Results Oriented
I use some very effective methods and talk therapy to effectively pinpoint and help release the negative thoughts & feelings that cause Anxiety, Worry, Fear, Panic, Anger, Depression, Guilt, Shame, and even Physical Pain.
And, on a personal note:
My wife is my best friend, and we do pretty much everything together. We love nature and take advantage of being out in it whenever we can.
We love the woods, mountain lakes, the ocean, and often visit parks (national or otherwise). Sometimes, we just enjoy exploring while traveling or driving around.
And, we also share our enjoyment of engaging in activities that help us continue to grow, become more aware, and contribute more to the world.
The ending to my story is of the “Happily Ever After” variety.
Who would of thunk it? I am so incredibly grateful for those wonderful things I have in life now, and I have to say that I owe it to the methods I have used over time that got me here. Thank you! Thank you!
And now, it may sound a bit crazy of me to say it, but there’s a big part of me now that is glad that I got so screwed up in so many ways. Because getting through/over those obstacles has been a treasure trove of learning experiences that I can now use to help others let go of their negativity so they can live happy, healthy, successful lives.
I have gained incredible knowledge, empathy, and understanding for my clients and know what to do to help them release their dysfunction.
Is that great or what?
